PASS THE BUCKET!!!!

From my mother's memoirs, during her chemotherapy:

Nichole and Jen wanted to teach me to play "Texas Hold 'Em" poker. We improvised a table using a dining room chair. Jen and Coly sat on chairs beside it and I sat in my comfy living room chair.

We were just about to get started playing when I saw my bucket out of the corner of my eye. Jen was to my left and I asked her to get the bucket and the wash cloth and put them next to me in case I would suddenly need them. Then I said we should have a fire drill and practice with the bucket so we would be ready.

I explained the drill: "Jen, when I say 'PASS THE BUCKET', you hand the bucket to me, Coly, you get the washcloth from the bucket and go immediately to the kitchen and run cold water on it and bring it back to me." Jen asked me what she was to do after she passed the bucket and I asked her what she wanted to do. She said, "I want to just get out of the room." "Fine", I said, "You just get out of the room, now let's have a practice drill. Are you ready?" "Yes" and "Yes" were the replies.

I said very slowly and very softly, "pass....the....bucket" In slow motion, Jen handed me the bucket, Coly slowly reached over and took the washcloth as they each lifted up off of their chairs and went to their appointed stations. Coly brought the cool cloth back, Jen returned to the room and they both sat down smugly confident in their performance. It was picture perfect. In fact it went so well that we then started our game of cards.

Coly dealt me a five and an Ace and two cards to Jen and to herself. We each bet a nickel. Then Coly started a 'flip' or a 'flop' pile that we all used to add to our cards. I bet another nickel based on my hand so far and a flop card which was a four. It made sense to me. They kept calling and raising and double daring each other so I just played along like I knew what was happening.

All of a sudden there were about fifty nickels on the chair and Jen was scooping them toward her. I yelled "PASS THE BUCKET!!!!" and all hell broke loose. Jen threw the bucket in my lap, Coly grabbed the cloth in mid-air and all I saw was the flash of their two behinds streaking out of the room and nickels flying everywhere. The girls gingerly returned while I laughed hysterically but they passed the surprise drill.